Comics Tagged : Bird

The Bank Loan (Part 3)

The Bank Loan (Part 3)

Strip Info

Title
The Bank Loan (Part 3)
Date
November 20, 2022
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Bank Office – Day

The bank Branch Manager sits behind his desk opposite Kevin and his bird, looking over a handfull of papers.

Branch Manager
Sir, this business plan was clearly written by your pet bird, and we don’t give bank loans to birds.
Panel 2 : Bank Office – Continuous

Dressed in a large, green bird outfit, Kevin scoffs. Dressed in a collar and tie, his bird perches next to him.

Kevin
That’s preposterious! Are you suggesting I’m not the one who came up with the idea for…
Panel 3 : Int. Bank Office – Continuous

Kevin picks up one of the loan application papers in front of him and reads it briefly.

Panel 4 : Bank Office – Continuous

Kevin returns to his hauty posture.

Kevin
…”Pluckr: The Dating App for Birds?”
Panel 5 : Int. Car – Later

Kevin drives home from the bank. On his shoulder, his bird throws up his wings in disgust.

Bird
It’s a billion dollar idea!
Kevin
Obviously. They have no vision.

The Bank Loan (Part 2)

The Bank Loan (Part 2)

Strip Info

Title
The Bank Loan (Part 2)
Date
November 13, 2022
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Car – Day

Kevin drives his car to the bank. On his arm sits his bird, dressed in a little collar and tie.

Bird
Listen, I need you to pretend to be me in this bank interview.
Kevin
What? Why?
Panel 2 : Int. Car – Continuous

The bird continues.

Bird
Because banks don’t give business loans to birds.
Kevin
Well, not with that attitude.
Panel 3 : Ext. Car – Continuous

The bird continues.

Bird
C’mon, be serious. Can you pretend to be me or not?
Kevin
Yeah yeah yeah. No problem.
Panel 4 : Int. Bank Office – Later

Kevin sits in a chair opposite the branch manager, who looks over the loan application. Kevin is wearing a giant parrot costume, grinning like an idiot. On his shoulder, his bird facepalms.

The Bank Loan (Part 1)

The Bank Loan (Part 1)

Strip Info

Title
The Bank Loan (Part 1)
Date
November 6, 2022
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Kevin’s Office – Day

Kevin sits at his desk, drawing. His bird, wearing a little collar and tie, walks up behind him.

Bird
I need a ride to the bank.
Kevin
Why?
Bird
Because I can’t drive.
Panel 2 : Int. Kevin’s Office – Continuous

Kevin looks confused.

Kevin
No- why do you need to go to the bank?
Bird
Because I have an interview for a business loan.
Panel 3 : Int. Kevin’s Office – Continuous

Same.

Kevin
Why do you have an interview for a business loan?
Bird
Because I don’t have the capital to start a business myself! Obviously!
Panel 4 : Int. Kevin’s Office – Continuous

Kevin turns around in his chair and smirks.

Kevin
So you’re saying you need seed money?
Bird
Forget it. I’ll take the bus.

Probably Just The Wind

Probably Just The Wind

Strip Info

Title
Probably Just The Wind
Date
October 9, 2022
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Living Room – Night

A sleepy Kevin lifts the cover on his bird’s cage.

Kevin (whispering)
Hey. Are you awake?
Bird
Well, I am now.
Panel 2 : Int. Living Room – Continuous

Kevin continues.

Kevin
I heard a scary noise outside. Can you come sleep next to me?
Bird
No! You’re a grown man. Go to bed!
Panel 3 : Int. Living Room – Continuous

A horrible sound: “-skritch- -skritch- BLEAGGGGH” comes from off-panel. Kevin and his bird freeze in fear.

Panel 4 : Int. Living Room – Continuous

Kevin lies in bed, wide awake, clutching a baseball bat. On the pillow next to him lies his bird, facing the other direction.

Bird
Just don’t roll over and crush me.

All That Flapping

All That Flapping

Strip Info

Title
All That Flapping
Date
August 14, 2022
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Ext. Kevin’s House – Day

Close up on Kevin, wearing a bike helmet. His parrot sits on his shoulder.

Kevin
What’s flying like?
Bird
Honestly? Overrated.
Panel 2 : Ext. Kevin’s House – Continuous

The bird continues.

Bird
Sure, it’s fun to soar above the trees. But it’s also exhausting. All that flapping.
Panel 3 : Ext. Kevin’s House – Continuous

Wider to reveal Kevin is standing on the roof of his house, looking over the edge. A pillow lashed to his chest and a bedsheet fastened to his arms as makeshift wings.

Kevin
Huh. So should I rethink this?
Char
Nah. You’re gonna love it.

Daily Affirmations

Daily Affirmations

Strip Info

Title
Daily Affirmations
Date
August 7, 2022
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Kevin’s House – Day

Kevin’s parrot smiles into his mirror.

Bird
Who’s a pretty bird? Who’s a pwitty widdle birdy? You are!
Panel 2 : Int. Kevin’s House – Continuous

The bird realizes Kevin is watching from the doorway behind him. Kevin snickers.

Panel 3 : Int. Kevin’s House – Continuous

The bird snaps.

Bird
What? Shut up! Like you don’t do it too!
Panel 4 : Int. Kevin’s House – Continuous

The bird continues.

Bird
Get outta here, pencilneck!

Kevin’s smirk fades.

Panel 5 : Int. Kevin’s House – Later

Kevin stands in front of his bathroom mirror. Frowning and tearing up, he points to himself.

Kevin
Don’t let him call you a pencilneck! Who’s a big, strong man? You are!

No “Off” Switch

No “Off” Switch

Strip Info

Title
No “Off” Switch
Date
June 12, 2022
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Ext. Beach – Day

Kevin sits on a beach chair on a sunny shore. Wearing an open Hawaiian shirt, he clasps his hands behind his head and smiles. His bird perches on his elbow.

Kevin
Isn’t this great? A week away from social media! No F.O.M.O. No stress…
Panel 2 : Ext. Beach – Continuous

Kevin and his bird sit in silence, soaking up the sun and surf.

Panel 3 : Ext. Beach – Continous

Another moment of quiet.

Panel 4 : Ext. Beach – Continous

Kevin’s bird turns to him.

Bird
You’re thinking of ways to turn this into content, aren’t you?
Kevin
Yes. I’m very broken.

One More Thing To Worry About

One More Thing To Worry About

Strip Info

Title
One More Thing To Worry About
Date
May 15, 2022
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Dining Room – Day

Close up on Kevin’s hand, holding his phone. On the screen, a FaceTime call with his Mother. Her camera looks up her nose in a very unflattering angle.

Mother
…And have you heard about this black hole? It’s 4 million times larger than our sun! It’s going to swallow us up!
Panel 2 : Int. Dining Room – Continuous

Kevin sits at a table, holding up his phone. His bird pearches on his shoulder. A bowl of fruit on the table nearby. Kevin smiles.

Kevin
Oh, Mom! I don’t think we have to worry about that for a long time.
Mother
If you say so…
Panel 3 : Int. Dining Room – Continous

Kevin waves goodbye.

Kevin
O.K. Gotta go. Love you.
Mother
Love you too.
Panel 4 : Int. Dining Room – Continous

Kevin and his bird panic, knocking over the bowl of fruit.

Bird
What the hell are we gonna do about this black hole?!?
Kevin
I DUNNO, MAN! I’M FREAKIN’ OUT!

The Procrastination Game

The Procrastination Game

Strip Info

Title
The Procrastination Game
Date
May 8, 2022
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Living Room – Day

Kevin sits on his couch, controller in hand, playing a video game. His bird sits next to him.

Kevin
Ugh. This game sucks.
Bird
Then why not play a game you like?
Panel 2 : Int. Living Room – Continuous

Kevin replies.

Kevin
Because if I play a game I like, I’ll get absorbed and won’t do the other things I have to do today.
Panel 3 : Int. Living Room – Continous

The bird ponders.

Bird
So why not do those other things first, then play a game you like?
Kevin
Because playing games is how I procrastinate.
Panel 4 : Int. Living Room – Continous

The bird looks concerned.

Bird
Wow, you’re all messed up, huh?
Kevin
My therapist calls me his “goldmine.”

Zoom Out

Zoom Out

Strip Info

Title
Zoom Out
Date
April 24, 2022
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Ext. Field – Night

Kevin lays in a field of grass at night, looking up at the stars. His bird lies on it’s back on his chest, also looking up.

Kevin
Ever zoom out and realize how insignificant we are?
Panel 2 : Ext. Field – Continuous

The bird replies.

Bird
I dunno. You’re pretty significant to me.
Kevin
Aww! Thanks! That’s sweet.
Panel 3 : Ext. Field – Continuous

Kevin and the bird lie in quiet for a beat.

Panel 4 : Ext. Field – Continuous

Same.

Bird
Don’t get me wrong: as soon as I figure out how to open bags of birdseed myself, you’re dead to me.

The Sensible Detective

The Sensible Detective

Strip Info

Title
The Sensible Detective
Date
April 17, 2022
Tags
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Notes

Fun fact: this is actually a redraw of a comic I first drew over 10 years ago. The original was part of an earlier version of my comics website called Funny Comics For Cool People. I produced about a dozen comics for it, but never actually launched the site. I always liked this idea, though. So I thought I’d take another swing at it.

Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Police Station – Day

A grizzled cop sips from a mug. Scowling.

Caption
Tuesdays at 8! He’s a homicide cop with no major vices…
Cop
Got drunk once. Didn’t enjoy it.
Panel 2 : Ext. Park – Continuous

The cop and wife give piggybacks to each of their two kids. Everyone smiles except the cop.

Caption
…no personal trauma…
Cop
All loved ones alive and well.
Panel 3 : Ext. Street – Night

The cop kneels at a crime scene near a corpse, covered in a bloody sheet. The cop looks at his watch.

Caption
…And healthy professional boundaries. He’s The Sensible Detective.
Cop
5p.m.- Quittin’ time.
Panel 4 : Int. Living Room – Continuous

Kevin sits on the couch with his bird, watching this commercial. They both furrow their brows.

Kevin
Well that’s no fun.
Bird
I prefer my protagonists damaged.

What’s In Your Wallet?

What’s In Your Wallet?

Strip Info

Title
What’s In Your Wallet?
Date
April 3, 2022
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. The Metaverse – Day

Kevin and his orc guide walk through a Metaverse landscape.

Kevin
So how do I get a sweet metaverse avatar like yours?
Orc
You have to pay for it.
Panel 2 : Int. The Metaverse – Continuous

Still walking.

Kevin
With real money?
Orc
With crypto!
Kevin
So… not real money?
Panel 3 : Int. Metaverse – Continuous

The orc stops. Kevin stands behind him

Orc
Kinda. It’a a digital curency. Here: let’s set up a wallet for you.

The orc reaches towards a glowing Bitcoin wallet icon.

Panel 4 : Int. The Metaverse – Continuous

In the real world, Kevin stands in his living room, looking confused in a VR headset. His bird perches on his arm.

Bird
How’s it going in there?
Kevin
I think I’m about to get swindled.