Every GenX Kid’s Dream
Bonus Panel
Strip Info
- Title
- Every GenX Kid’s Dream
- Date
- August 6, 2023
- Tags
- awkward, Bird, bonus panel, couch, Future Kevin, Kevin, movies, Past Kevin, pop culture, self care, social interactions, The Future, time travel, TV
Transcript
- Panel 1 : Int. Teenage Kevin’s Room – Day
-
Teenage Kevin looks surprised when Future Kevin appears out of a wormhole behind him.
- In the year 1993…
-
- Future Kevin
- Hey Kevin! I’m YOU from the future! I’ve got great news!
- Panel 2 : Int. Teenage Kevin’s Room – Continuous
-
Future Kevin continues.
-
- Future Kevin
- Thirty years from now, they’re going to make a great TMNT movie!
- Teenage Kevin (O.S.)
- Big deal. We’ve already had three TMNT movies.
-
Future Kevin holds up a poster for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtes: Mutant Mayhem.
- Panel 3 : Int. Teenage Kevin’s Room – Continuous
-
Future Kevin continues.
-
- Future Kevin
- Yeah, but this one will have a score by Trent Reznor!
- Teenage Kevin (dismissive)
- ~OK cool~ Thanks for letting me know. Bye!
-
Teenage Kevin waves his future self away.
- Panel 4 : Int. Teenage Kevin’s Room – Continuous
-
Future Kevin shrugs.
-
- Future Kevin
- I thought you’d be excited! What are you do–
- Teenage Kevin (interrupting)
- JUST GO!
-
We now can see that Teenage Kevin, hunched over, has hastily thrown a blanket over his groin.
- Bonus Panel : Int. Future Kevin’s House – Later
-
Back in the future, Future Kevin stands in his living room, shivering in disgust. Nearby, his bird scoffs.
-
- Bird
- It’s your fault. You gotta knock, remember?
Catching Up
Bonus Panel
Strip Info
- Title
- Catching Up
- Date
- July 30, 2023
- Tags
- beach, Bird, bonus panel, dumb things people do, Kevin, self care, social media, Twitter, vacation
Transcript
- Panel 1 : Int. Apartment – Day
-
Kevin, wearing a Hawaiian shirt and carrying luggage, stands in the doorway of his house. His bird greets him with raised wings.
-
- Bird
- Hey hey! Welcome back from vacation!
- Kevin
- Thanks! What did I miss?
- Panel 2 : Int. Apartment – Continuous
-
Kevin’s bird ponders.
-
- Bird
- Let’s see… He renamed it “X”, but he doesn’t own the trademark. So there probably a bunch of lawsuits coming. Also: he limited the number of tweets you can read without paying.
- Panel 3 : Int. Apartment – Continuous
-
Kevin’s smile fades. His face ages as he listens to his bird go on.
-
- Bird
- Oh! And he started paying people to post, but you have to subscribe first – which kinda sounds like a pyramid scheme?
- Panel 4 : Int. Apartment – Continuous
-
Kevin turns around and walks away, dragging his luggage with him. His bird calls after him.
-
- Bird
- …and did I mention he wants us to use it as a banking app? BECAUSE HE WANTS US TO USE IT AS A BANKING APP!
- Bonus Panel 1 : Ext. Beach – Later
-
Now at the beach at sunset, Kevin drags his luggage behind him as he walks into the ocean.
- Bonus Panel 2 : Ext. Beach – Later
-
Kevin is gone under the water. All that’s left are his footsteps and the drag marks of his luggage.
A Shorts Story
Bonus Panel
Strip Info
- Title
- A Shorts Story
- Date
- July 2, 2023
- Tags
- anxiety, awkward, BBQ, Bird, body positivity, bonus panel, Kevin, relatable, roast, shorts, social interactions, white people
Transcript
- Panel 1 : Int. Apartment – Day
-
Kevin stands in his apartment, wearing teal shorts, revealing his skinny, pale legs. His bird, standing on a nearby table, leans over in interest.
-
- Bird
- What’s with the shorts? You never wear shorts
- Kevin
- I’m going to a BBQ and it’s too hot out for pants.
- Panel 2 : Int. Apartment – Continuous
-
The bird continues.
-
- Bird
- Wow. You’re wearing them in public? But people will see your bare legs!
- Kevin
- I know. But I’m sure no one will notice.
- Panel 3 : Ext. Field – Later
-
Kevin is at the BBQ. Some jerk yells to the crowd.
-
- Some Jerk
- Hey everyone! The chicken legs we ordered are here!
- Panel 4 : Int. Apartment – Later
-
After the party, Kevin is back home.
-
- Bird
- Sooo… how’d it go?
- Kevin
- Never again.
-
Kevin sets his shorts on fire with a lighter.
Touch Grass
Bonus Panel
Strip Info
- Title
- Touch Grass
- Date
- June 25, 2023
- Tags
- bonus panel, capitalism, computers, creativity, guilt, Kevin, mental health, nature, park, productivity, relatable, rest, self care, shame, The Grustle Monster
Transcript
- Panel 1 : Ext. Park – Afternoon
-
Kevin lies in the grass of a field on a sunny summer day. Eyes closed. Hands behind his head. Smiling.
-
- Kevin
- Aaaaah. There’s nothing like a lazy summer afternoon…
- Panel 2 : Ext. Park – Continuous
-
Closer on Kevin’s face as a strange shadow creeps over him. He opens one eye to see:
- Panel 3 : Ext. Park – Continuous
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Kevin’s POV: The Grustle Monster standing over him, blocking out the sun. Furrowed brow. Frowning.
- Panel 4 : Ext. Park – Continuous
-
Wider to reveal The Grustle Monster looming over Kevin in a menacing way.
-
- Kevin
- Damnit I’m allowed to rest!
- Panel 5 : Ext. Park – Later
-
Later, two passersby notice Kevin sitting on the grass, his full, two-monitor desktop set up in the grass in front of him.
-
- Passerby 1
- Did that guy bring his desktop to the park?
The Future of Entertainment
Strip Info
- Title
- The Future of Entertainment
- Date
- June 18, 2023
- Tags
- AI art, artificial intelligence, capitalism, dumb things people do, gadgets, movies, pop culture, technology, TV, virtual reality
Transcript
- Panel 1 : Int. VR Headset – Day
-
From a user’s POV inside a VR headset, a cute robot character floats into view.
-
- Genie
- Hi! I’m Genie, your A.I.-powered entertainment bot! What do you want to watch today?
- User (O.S.)
- I wanna watch a movie where Spider-Man fights Batman at Wrestlemania!
- Panel 2 : Int. Living Room – Continuous
-
The user sits in his recliner, a beer in his hand
-
- Genie (O.S.)
- Sorry. I’m afraid I can’t do that.
- User
- Why not? I thought A.I. can create whatever I want.
- Panel 3 : Int. VR Headset – Continuous
-
In the headset, Genie explains.
-
- Genie
- Well, see… Spider-Man is owned by Disney, Batman is owned by Warner Bros, and Wrestlemania is WWE. To combine them legally, I would need a licensing agreement between all three companies that allows for… (trailing off)
- Panel 4 : Ext. Street – Later
-
Later, on the side of the road, two sanitation workers empty trash cans into a garbage truck. One worker holds up something he fished out of a can.
-
- Sanitation Worker
- Hey look! Another pair a’them expensive goggles!
Grandpa’s Making Up Words Again
Bonus Panel
Strip Info
- Title
- Grandpa’s Making Up Words Again
- Date
- May 28, 2023
- Tags
- bonus panel, entertainment, Grandpa, HBO, HBO Go, HBO Max, little boy, Netflix, pop culture, Quibi, Roku, streaming, technology, The Future, The Internet, TV, wholesome
Transcript
- Panel 1 : Int. Retirement Home – Day
-
A young boy sits at his grandpa’s feet.
-
- Young Boy
- Grandpa? What were the Streaming Wars like?
- Panel 2 : Int. Retirement Home – Continuous
-
Grandpa sits in his easy chair.
-
- Grandpa
- Well, it all started when Netflix tried to launch Qwikster. Then HBO became HBO Go…
- Panel 3 : Int. Retirement Home – Continuous
-
Grandpa continues.
-
- Grandpa
- …See, back then, we got our HBO Go through Hulu on our Roku, but then HBO Go became HBO Max…
- Panel 4 : Int. Retirement Home – Continuous
-
The little boy looks confused as Grandpa finishes.
-
- Grandpa
- …And after Roku bought all the shows from Quibi, HBO Max became just Max.
- Panel 5 : Ext. Retirement Home – Later
-
The young boy’s Mom leads him to their car.
-
- Mom
- How was your visit with Grandpa?
- Young Boy
- Confusing.
-
In the background, Grandpa waves from the porch of his retirement home.
Work Friends
Bonus Panel
Strip Info
- Title
- Work Friends
- Date
- May 14, 2023
- Tags
- awkward, Batman, Batman In Therapy, Commissioner Gordon, Gotham City, masculinity, mental health, pop culture, social interactions, therapy
Transcript
- Panel 1 : Ext. Gotham City PD Roof – Night
-
Commissioner Gordon and Batman stand on the roof of the GCPD headquarters at night near the bat symbol.
-
- Commissioner Gordon
- Thanks for helping us catch The Riddler, Batman. Gotham owes you a great debt.
- Panel 2 : Ext. Gotham City PD Roof – Continuous
-
Gordon and Batman stand facing each other for an awkward beat.
- Panel 3 : Ext. Gotham City PD Roof – Continuous
-
Batman blurts out.
-
- Batman
- …Wanna hang out after work?
- Panel 4 : Int. Psychiatrist’s Office – Later
-
Batman lays on a couch. Behind him in a chair, his therapist takes notes.
-
- Therapist
- …And how are we doing with forming male friendships?
- Batman
- I’m so awkward!
- Panel 5 : Int. All-Nite Diner – Later
-
Batman and Gordon sit stiffly in a booth of an all-night diner. Each has a strawberry milkshake in front of them.
-
- Batman
- How’s your milkshake?
- Commissioner Gordon
- – I should get home to my family…
At a Loss
Strip Info
Transcript
- Panel 1 : Int. BuzzFeed Office – Day
-
Kevin walks into the lobby of BuzzFeed. Headphones in, backpack on, lanyard clipped to his pants pocket. He looks non-challant.
- Panel 2 : Int. BuzzFeed Office – Moments Later
-
Kevin stops at the receptionist’s desk. The receptionist points off-panel. Kevin takes his headphone out of his ear and raises his eyebrows to listen to what the receptionist is saying.
- Panel 3 : Int. BuzzFeed Office – Later
-
Kevin stands in a nearby hallway. A sad look on his face. He hands over a yellow BuzzFeed “LOL” icon to a person with a BuzzFeed logo for a face. The literal personification of the company, if you will.
- Panel 4 : Int. Apartment – Later
-
Later, at home, Kevin lies on his side on his couch. Under a blanket, he stares off into the distance. Over him, on the top edge of the couch, his bird perches, extending a wing in an awkward, concerned gesture.
The Face of a Real Man
Strip Info
- Title
- The Face of a Real Man
- Date
- April 16, 2023
- Tags
- gross up, gruff fellow, Kevin, masculinity, moisturizer, self care, skincare, sunscreen, toxic masculinity
Transcript
- Panel 1 : Int. Void – Day
-
Close on Kevin’s hands, shaking a bit of moisturizer from a pink bottle into his palm. A few feet away, a gruff-looking fellow puts up his hand in protest.
-
- Gruff-Looking Fellow
- Moisturizer? With sunscreen? -pfft- I don’t use any of that girlie stuff.
- Panel 2 : Int. Void – Continuous
-
The gruff-looking fellow gets in Kevin’s face, pointing at his own. Kevin recoils.
-
- Gruff-Looking Fellow
- This here’s the face of a real man!
- Panel 3 : Int. Void – Continuous
-
Extreme close-up on the fellow’s scowling face. It’s burnt, cracked, pock-marked, and craggy. It’s… not pleasant.
- Panel 4 : Int. Void – Continuous
-
Kevin winces.
-
- Kevin
- Real men have skin cancer?
- Gruff-Looking Fellow
- You mean my face rubble?
Starting A New Hobby – Part 2
Strip Info
- Title
- Starting A New Hobby – Part 2
- Date
- April 2, 2023
- Tags
- Bird, crafts, creativity, hobbies, Kevin, metalworking, recreation, relatable, weird things people do
Transcript
- Panel 1 : Int. Kevin’s Apartment – Day
-
Kevin stands at his table, wearing a metalworking visor, apron, and gloves. He holds a welding torch in his hand. On the table in front of him, a vise holds a piece of metal. Kevin’s bird, wearing a visor of his own, looks on from a pile of nearby metalworking gear.
-
- Kevin
- OK! After buying all this gear, I’m finally ready to try my new hobby for the first time!
- Panel 2 : Int. Kevin’s Apartment – Continuous
-
Kevin presses his torch to the metal. Sparks fly everywhere.
- Panel 3 : Int. Kevin’s Apartment – Continuous
-
Kevin turns off the torch. The metal has melted into an unattractive lump.
- Panel 4 : Int. Kevin’s Apartment – Continuous
-
Kevin turns to walk away, throwing the torch over his shoulder.
-
- Kevin
- Whelp, I’m no good at this. I quit!
- Panel 5 : Int. Kevin’s Apartment – Months Later
-
Kevin sits on his couch, rubbing his chin in thought.
-
- Kevin
- I think I want to try a new craft as a hobby…
-
His bird facepalms.